Are the doubts about your marriage growing? Do you feel increasingly ill-at-ease with your spouse? Do you find yourself quietly pondering what life would be like if you were single again? If so, you know that your marriage isn’t on steady ground — but how do you know if it’s time to call it quits?

According to psychologists, people hesitate to drop the axe on their relationships for one of three basic reasons: They don’t want to be blamed, they don’t want to let go of the familiar or they’re just plain afraid of making a mistake. Despite your fears, however, there are some definite signs that your marriage is over:

  • Your spouse’s ideas about marriage aren’t compatible with yours. Every marriage has unwritten “rules.” If you feel like you were blindsided by your spouse’s hidden expectations for you and the marriage, you probably aren’t right for each other.
  • Your spouse makes you doubt yourself. Your spouse is supposed to help you be your most authentic self and build you up — not tear you down.
  • You don’t even recognize yourself (or your spouse). If your spouse’s personality has changed for the worse — or your personality has taken a negative turn — that’s a sign of deep dissatisfaction.
  • You like the idea of being alone. If you find yourself happier when your spouse isn’t home, you probably are ready to be single.
  • You don’t listen to each other. If you’re tuning each other out, that’s a clue that you’re no longer really even interested in working things out.
  • You have nothing to talk about. If you’re the only one making conversation (or you’ve tried and given up), that’s a sign that your spouse is no longer emotionally connected.
  • Your spouse blames you for everything. Marital disputes are rarely one-sided. If your spouse isn’t willing to make a few adjustments and expects you to do it all, that’s bad.
  • You don’t even care that your marriage is broken. You may be more attached to your anger and grief than you are your spouse.

There’s no reason to stay married unhappily-ever-after. Find out what it takes to start divorce proceedings here in Texas.